Sunday, February 25, 2007

Experimental Pills

A woman goes to her doctor and tells him that she can't get any from her husband. So he gives her some pills and says "they are experimental pills, put two into his coffee and see what happens".

So she does and the next morning come back and says "the sex was great what if I use ten?"

And the docter replied "they are experimental pills so try it and see what happens".

So the next day she comes back and says "the sex was better, can I put the whole bottle in and see what happens?"

The next morning a little boy comes in and says, "my mother's dead, my sister's pregnant, my arse hurts like hell and my father is sitting in the corner saying "here kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty."





The Three Stars

One day avant-garde violinist Malcolm Goldstein, US Ambassador to Spain Eduardo Aguirre, and television's Tony Danza were on a jungle vacation together when they were caught by a tribal group.
Before they were about to be executed, they pleaded to the Queen of the Tribe for mercy. She said, ''Get me something good to eat. If I like it, you will be freed.'' The three men looked at each other and agreed. They then went into the jungle to look for some food

Malcolm Goldstein was the first to come back. He came up to the altar and offered grapes. The Queen tasted one and immediately spat it out. She ordered her servants to shove the rest of the grapes up Malcolm Goldstein's ass. The servants did their duty, and left Malcolm Goldstein lying on theground screaming.

Eduardo Aguirre was the next to arrive with some yummy apples. The same thing happened to him, but curiously he laughed as the apples were shoved up his ass. Malcolm Goldstein was shocked. Here he was with grapes up his ass howling in pain, but Eduardo Aguirre had several apples in his ass and he was laughing. He asked him ''What the hell are you laughing about?''

A laughing Eduardo Aguirre replied ''Tony Danza's coming back with a watermelon

Me squall at 8:50 PM

Saturday, February 24, 2007

NICE STORY AND FUNNY TOO.. READ IT TILL END..

Little Bobby came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His
birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his
mother what he wanted. Mom, I want a bike for my birthday. Little Bobby was
a bit of a troublemaker.

He had gotten into trouble at school and at home. Bobby's mother asked him
if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday. Little Bobby, of
course, thought he did. Bobby's mother wanted Bobby to reflect on his
behavior over the last year. Go to your room, Bobby, and think about how you
have behaved this year. Then write a letter to God and tell him why you
deserve a bike for your birthday. Little Bobby stomped up the steps to his
room and sat down to write God a letter.

*Letter 1

*Dear God,

I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my
birthday. I want a red one.

Your friend,
Bobby

Bobby knew that this wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this year,
so he tore up the letter and started over.

*Letter 2

*Dear God,

This is your friend Bobby. I have been a good boy this year and I would like
a red bike for my birthday. Thank you.

Your friend,
Bobby

Bobby knew that this wasn't true either. So, he tore up the letter and
started again.

*Letter 3
*
Dear God,

I have been an OK boy this year. I still would really like a bike for my
birthday.
Bobby

Bobby knew he could not send this letter to God either. So, Bobby wrote a
fourth letter.

*Letter 4

*God,

I know I haven't been a good boy this year. I am very sorry. I will be a
good boy if you just send me a bike for my birthday. Please! Thank you,

Bobby

Bobby knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get him a
bike.

Now, Bobby was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mom that he
wanted to go to church. Bobby's mother thought her plan had worked, as Bobby
looked very sad. Just be home in time for dinner, Bobby's mother told him.

Bobby walked down the street to the church on the corner. Little Bobby went
into the church and up to the altar. He looked around to see if anyone was
there. Bobby bent down and picked up a statue of the Mary. He slipped the
statue under his shirt and ran out of the church, down the street, into the
house, and up to his room. He shut the door to his room and sat down with a
piece of paper and a pen.... Bobby began to write his letter to God.

*Letter 5

*God,

I'VE KIDNAPPED YOUR MAMA. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE!

Me squall at 8:36 PM

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

The public holidays for CNY are finally over, well too bad for those who are going back to schooling and working people. Tsk tsk . Well for those who are enjoying the holidays, I just have one word to say, “HUARRY!” Haha. Enjoy the holidays. Yup. . . . .

This year CNY is another boring festival. Well people sure shoot back to me. “ CNY so fun, get to see your relatives again, especially those that we had not been in contact for the past year.” Ya indeed there are some new faces that I haven’t see them before. Some are see le also don’t want to see. Haha. Well the reunion dinner is still quite ok la, just that some of the food… Ya having steamboat, not bad la. But had too much red wine and had headache for the rest of the night time.

First day of the CNY is quite normal, don’t need wake up early in the morning to visit relatives, but I’m woke up by my parents early in the morning, and still suffer a bit of headache(ya the redwine) Haha. Well actually is about ¾ bottle of the wine ba. Haha.
Then visited relatives..blah… the worst part is, no dinner for that day. Zzz.. Because had lunch at one of the relatives house, and were forced to swallow food at another relatives house, after being threatened that that’s no dinner for that day. Zzz…

Second day of the CNY is damn noisy day. Have to wake up early in the morning to visit relatives. Well I hate the part when you have to stuck at a place doing nothing but stared at the wall for hours. And it did happen. Haiz… Yup second day final stop is always at my mum’s parent house for dinner. And this year we the first to reach there (normally we the last or last second to arrive) Yes exactly 12pm. Please count how many hours to dinner time? 6 to 7 hours. Damn. And I’m stuck at that place for 7 hours, with my auntie’s son keep pesting me to lend him my handphone to him to play the games. And more to contribute to the noise pollution is the gambling. Ya stupid adults playing poker, worst still they playing 21 dian. Damn it. It’s so childish. Every year the same old stuff. Can’t they play tai di ? If they play tai di they sure lose man. Haha. Well actually after dinner we suppose to go to my dad’s parents house to celebrate grandma birthday. But I ran off around 7++ without attending the birthday party, and of course no dinner because no mood to eat after being pest by someone, and of course humiliation by one of the relatives indirectly. Yes always from her, and always the same of thingy. Fuck off man. You think you very great huh. Ya her daughter, which is my cousin, just got her o level results, and is planning to go jjc. Damn so what. Ya that’s her second daughter, who is also study same sec sch as me. Know what? Last year that auntie’s third daughter humiliate my sec sch by saying all those bad things about my sec sch. Ya actually who cares about the school. But it’s indirectly pointing those who attending that school, saying they are lousy. So what she attend BPGH. Hack care. I hate that whole family to the core man. They better watch out.

And now the third day of CNY, no visiting of relatives, and im sick of it. It ruins everything, your schedule, everything and everything, and also destroy. Ya those food really destroyed. Damn. That’s why this year I’m more determined than ever to fulfill the resolution for this year. And gonna show them how’s the boss around next year!! Haha

Me squall at 11:59 PM

Saturday, February 17, 2007



HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR! =) GONG XI FA CAI. wootz..


Nothing to be happy about. lols. Haha damped the mood here. LOLs. Well at least for me ba. Haha. All the ang bao money will go to the stupid lost phone. Yes now boiling mad. Haha. Pay for nothing. LOLs.


Well just now went to have reunion dinner at grandma house. Haha great tio pinpoint indirectly yet again. Haiz.. gonna hear it again for the nest few days.
Why still looked like tt? Oh! no change ah. See your cousin grow so much! Look he grow till so handsome. Blah Blah. Ya they didnt say me, but you just can't ignored whatever they have said. Zzz..


Well another problem could be the food. Damn, just wish all the food have posion. So the temptation would be gone. Well ya gonna try harder man. I won't give up. Haha.


Well wish everyone a happy and prosperous year ahead.

Me squall at 9:38 PM

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Early post today. haha. Just came back from bulit gombak. Do what? Haha. Went there to fetch my new spec with my dad. LOLs. Well i should say th colour of the spec is suitable to my hair colour. Haha. o.O!
You all should know how special is today for those couples/married ppl out there. Did I missed out anything. Hmm.. OK. To me, it's waste of time, money, freedom and of course your life. Haha. Although I agree it should be treated as a festival,( like the coming CNY) because it only comes once a year. But don't you think you'll burn your pocket, in terms of gifts, including ingredients for DIY stuffs, ya all those merchandisers are getting smart lately.
Another i time-wasting, you gonna waste time prepare this major festival, lols. haha. okok. I'll stop laughing. LOLs. Ya I agree preparation is still needed for anything, including surprises. Well the main point I want to bring across is do anything that comes from your heart, with sincerely, although most of the gurls out there doesn't appreciate these stuffs anymore.
Oh ya I did mention freedom and life. Haha. It's just an example la. Haha. o.O!

Me squall at 12:57 PM

Monday, February 12, 2007

Wooo today been a nice day. Went to greenridge with mum, bought stuffs/food. The highlight for today is bought the dye. Haha. Then dyed my hair, beige brown. =X lols. It's just like puring chemicals on your head. Haha. And hor, got the ammonia smell. LOLs. Well mum did help in the process of dying my hair. LOLs.
Been 2 days le, hmm.. probably wont be hired ba. Haha. If like that then have to wait until CNY is over, then start looking again. Haha.
Improve one self, and not change. lols =x

Me squall at 4:32 PM

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Piang... woke up around 10am.. prepared to go trim my hair. lols. Well don't know why, but today quite a lot of customers sia. Haha. Well the end product didn't really met mine ..... ok haha ...
Then in the afternoon went around bugis and city hall area finding job. haha. Did we found one? Well just have to wait and see. haha. no more details.. haha. =X I also lazy to type now, damn tired. LOLs.
After travelled to boon lay. First meet up with my mum at lakeside mrt, then took bus to boon lay there la.Yup walked around, of course the objective of going there is to buy clothes. Haha. Of course I bought a few la. LOLs. Did u called me JZ? LOLs. I didnt heard u leh. Haha. Ps. LOLS.
Then again walked around, buying food? I dont know, I just follow. LOLs. Then dad picked us up and then travelled to bukit gombak mrt there. YUP there. LOLs. Go there for wat? Make a new spec. Haha. But hor, I dont know why, maybe due to tiredness, eyestrain or blah thingy, in the end I didn't make one.o.o! But my mum and dad made one for themselves la. Hang around quite a long time. o.o!
Then had dinner around the area. Want to buy dye de, but.. all the shops closed le. Zzz.. Well tml morning have to go back to tt spec shop again. LOLs.

Me squall at 10:51 PM

Friday, February 09, 2007



Ya although there's improvement for the 2006 batch, too bad for ths 2006 batch nobody get 11 A1s. Haha. O_o!


Videos Share


Jokes
For The Kids...
What do ghosts have in the seats of their cars?

Sheet belts!



What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date?

Any old girl he can dig up!



Why did the Scottish cannibal live on a sugar plantation?

He said ''So that I can feed my lads with m'lasses!



Why would the cannibal only eat babies?

He was on a diet!



Where do ghosts go on holiday?

The Ghosta Brava!



Why wouldn't the vampire eat his soup?

It clotted!



Why did the skeleton run up a tree?

Because a dog was after his bones!

Me squall at 6:27 PM

Thursday, February 08, 2007

This week probably marks the internal limit of anxiousness and frustration of finding a job. Haha. Actually not that serious la. As day passed by, the more I get anxious, and I really don’t know why. Haha. Now have some targets le, so hmm hope will work out fine.
Tuesday Isaac and I went out to look at the pants he wanted to buy. Haha. First stop was IMM, looking around, clothes, shoes, jeans(for him la, I don’t need any)
Next was suntec, lol. Walked around and in the end didn’t buy anything. Then walked around the area, marina square and blah… Haha. I should say we went home empty-handed la. LOL.
Ok long time didn’t post jokes le, here’s a few.

Jokes
Excited About Marriage
Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, are all excited about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and on the way they pass a drugstore. Jacob suggests they go in. Jacob addresses the man behind the counter: 'Are you the owner?' The pharmacist answers yes. Says Jacob: 'We're about to get married. Do you sell heart medication?' Pharmacist: 'Of course we do.' Jacob: 'How about medicine for circulation?' Pharmacist: 'All kinds.' Jacob: 'Medicine for rheumatism, scoliosis? ' Pharmacist: 'Definitely.' Jacob: 'How about Viagra?' Pharmacist: 'Of course.' Jacob: 'Medicine for memory problems, arthritis, jaundice?' Pharmacist: 'Yes, a large variety. The works.' Jacob: 'What about vitamins, sleeping pills, Geritol, antidotes for Parkinson's disease?' Pharmacist: 'Absolutely.' Jacob: 'You sell wheelchairs and walkers?' Pharmacist: 'All speeds and sizes.' Jacob says to the pharmacist: 'We'd like to register here for our wedding gifts, please.'


An Elderly Woman's Portrait
An elderly woman decided to have her portrait painted. She instructed the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, an emerald necklace, a ruby bracelet, and a Rolex watch." "But you're not wearing any of those things!" the artist said. "I know," she replied. "But if I should die before my husband, I'm sure he'll remarry right away, and I want his new wife to go crazy looking for the jewelry!"


For The Kids...
Q: What does a cat call a bowl of mice?
A: A purrfect meal!

Q: Why did the cat sleep under the car?
A: Because she wanted to wake up oily!

Q: What did the cat do when he swallowed some cheese?
A: He waited by the mouse hole with baited breath!

Q: What is another way to describe a cat?
A: A heat seeking missile!

Me squall at 5:19 PM

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Today managed to drag my feet out, and go around with mui ling finding jobs at ten mile and bpp. I'm not in the hurry, and don't know why most of the available jobs not suitable for me. Why? Because of gender! o.o! Haha nvm, continue look lor, online also can find de. lols.
Singapore retained the crown. Wootz. But from what I see, most of the time Singapore is defending. Thailand desperate to win the trophy, since 2 yrs ago they failed to reach the finals. A 1-1 draw made Singapore the second country to win the trophy 3 times(Thailand 3 times too).
Haha. Ok I'm not going back to school le, maybe if there's CE activity then i go back? lols. See first bah. LOLs.
Signing off..... o.o!

Me squall at 10:27 PM

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Nothing much happen today la. Cant really expect something to happen ( money dropped drop sky?) LOL. Well after the long post(it's more than 600 words in total), I don't know what to write suddenly. Haha. Ok go back to downlod stuffs again. Ya stuffs... o.o!
Liverpool vs Everton, 205 derby match. half time result is 0 - 0. Root for Liverpool to win,and of course thi season title too. Yeah! LOL.
Just now rushig for the FYP rj,luckily havent due. Phew! It dues today 11.59pm. Haha. Already finished lor.
So cya peeps. ^^

Me squall at 9:49 PM

It’s been days since I blog and I’m back. Ok 1 week didn’t go to school. Haha. Am I bad? Naughty? Attitude? Now left a few days to holiday start, but for me I think already start liao. LOL. Doing stuffs here and there, wee. Nothing feels great when you don’t need to worry about anything at all, and doing what you like. Isn’t it paradise? Well I don’t really consider it as paradise, as I personally think it’s far from being great.
Maybe some might not know, and I’m here to announce that I’ve quit audition le. So won’t find me playing. Why quit? Some asked. Why? Well there are a lot of factors, and of course it got to relate to virtual reality and reality (which I’ve been taught in school in this semester). Haha.
Well you may ask what the hell virtual reality is. It means a computer simulation/ simulation reality where a computer simulates a three-dimensional physical environment using visual and auditory stimuli with and within which people can interact to affect what happens in the simulation Example would be WWC, Maplestory and even audition.
Err.. I can’t really remember what my team touched on for the virtual reality topic, because I know we are given roles and to explore. Oh now I remember, my team touched on gamers, while other teams touched on roles like bloggers/parents/government and more lah.
Some of the research we found was like addiction, death cases (where some play till they die, it’s true, not lies) And also explore on the relationship on virtual reality and reality. Haha.
Ok talk so long, so now come back to my reasons for quitting audition.
First, it does no help for your future. You may think it helps in terms of flexibility and your reflexes. The cons outweigh the pros. Indeed. For students studies are far more important than a stupid game which brings no benefits.
Secondly it’s waste of energy and time, and would do harm either physically of emotionally, or both. There are always dangers on the net. You may hear your parents saying meeting strangers on the net is dangerous blah blah thing. But who cares, for me as long as it benefits my well being, then I shall do anything I want. Haha. Sometimes you can play until you forgot your meals and so on and thus bring harm to your body. Those emotional suffering you experienced on the net can affect your in reality, which bring up the issue of crossing over the border line of virtual reality and reality.
Thirdly, it’s waste of money! Some online games maybe free to play, but don’t let the word “free” fool you. Example for asiasoft games, you wanna be dress beautifully or look nice in the game(virtual world), you gonna use your money(reality world) to buy these things in the games. This again bring up the point where virtual reality has overlap your reality world. Virtual reality can be very tempting for people who don’t really get what they want in reality world, so by using money (reality world) to exchange the what they want in reality world.
Haha. Wanna know since I started playing audition, how much I spent on this stupid game? $150 dollars for prepaid card, $600 for my lost phone, $500 for my new phone. Total is $1250. Damn it’s a lot. It really hurts when I lost my phone again in pc bunk. I shall curse that person who had picked up my phone. I haven’t back the phone, damn, and I lost it. Damn. Paying for nothing man. -_-! And of course the emotional sufferings of losing phone and waste so much money sure hurts me a lot.
So I am an example of a victim of the virtual reality. Think for your future, want to live or die? It’s your choice, nobody will decide for you, only you can make the final decision.
Goodbye peeps! Ya it’s a long post. Haha. O.o!

Me squall at 4:00 AM